I got knocked out twice the summer before turning ten years old.
Two hard hits to the head.
I've wondered over the years if any lasting effects remain.
I've wondered over the years if any lasting effects remain.
Sorry, my poor attempt at humor.
With concussion protocols, and CTE testing in the news, maybe it's a valid question.
CTE, Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy, is linked to memory loss, difficulty making plans, poor judgement, mood swings, and other issues and conditions. An interesting article...
https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/17686-chronic-traumatic-encephalopathy-cte
My story, briefly...the first one was August, 1975. A month before my 10th birthday. Some big guys, teenagers, were in the field across from Chuck's house. They had cut a tree down. We went over to see what was going on. They didn't need our help, but they didn't run us off either. So Chuck and I started throwing wood into the trailer with them. When you are a little guy, all you want to do is fit in with the big guys. Add the sound of a chainsaw, and we couldn't resist.
I was on the opposite side from Barry Williamson. He was about 17. He tossed a big chunk of firewood. It either bounced, or sailed over the trailer. It hit me in the head. The next thing I recall, is seeing alot of sky, and everybody standing over me. They said it knocked me out. They helped me up and me and Chuck went on our way. I never told my parents.
Barry comes in here where I work. We've never talked about that day. I mentioned it to him about a year ago. He is a quiet and serious guy. He said he thought he'd really hurt me. I could tell he still felt bad about it. I told him, "Ahhh dont worry. I was in the wrong place. Just part of growing up!" And we both laughed about it.
The second time...Same summer. A couple of weeks later. Pop Warner football practice - Knock Out number two.
I was big for my ten years, and looked like I belonged out there. Also on that team were some motivated and angry thirteen year olds. For reasons I can't explain, the coaches had me practicing at the linebacker position. Our Fullback was Scott Fenton. He was one of the angry, motivated thirteen year olds.
As the next play developed, the O line opened up a nice gap for Scott. I moved to the gap, staying low like they had taught us. As I squared up and said Hello, Scott gave me my second lesson in physics in two weeks.
Everybody got a water break. I was unconscious on the ground. I don't remember any pain, just embarrassment, as I came to, as they say. The coaches wouldn't give me my helment back. I found out later Scott and I managed to crack it right up the middle. They found another one and put it on my head. Then they slapped me on my ten year old butt, and told me to get back in there.
I stayed with it, and made some life long friends. We had a great season and won the league. Then we went on to Pulaski and beat Giles County's best team in the Butter Bowl.
That was my only season of football. Later in Junior High and High School, I still had size, but not the desire. The tough guys were my friends, and several years ahead of me in experience. Pretty sure I missed out on some good Football times. We will never know.
So are there any lasting effects from those two big hits?
My sense of humor is still there. Then again. Here is an example to consider...This is our coffee Drawer at work.
Does anyone else see the angry little face looking up at us? Or is it just me? I met Chucky, as I call him, on my first day. We talk every morning as the coffee is brewing.
My perceptions, and mannerisms are not always the same as other people. I understand quirky, because I am quirky. Not sure if that involves a level of paranoia, anxiety, or othew issues.
There are people in our family with clinical depression. And some with diagnosed, and undiagnosed mental problems. Those are some of my favorite relatives. Growing up in that, I think there is a wide, blurry line between, "having it all together," and not so much.
Maybe Unconsciousness, and Mindfulness are not so far apart.
Both states are difficult to access, and even harder to remain in.
There have been times that an effort in sports has been described as, "That player was unconscious out there. Just going through the motions." Some days excellence comes easier than others. Like you are in a zone and no one can touch you.
Then there is Mondfulness.
That's a word I dont use much.
My buddy, Lee Deckleman uses that word alot now. He has a unique and powerful story. A link to Lee addressing the Tullahoma High school ROTC. "Leadership for Cadets". 48 minutes. Well worth your time to watch and listen. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9_iSYwLEE78
A link to a thirty minute interview of Lee talking about his book. Source: Youtube. Talkin' Tullahoma with Kelly Lapczynski https://www.youtube.com/watch?reload=9&app=desktop&v=iT1W1h1KPlk
Lee's childhood, military service, and adult experiences, brought him to a place where he learned to access Mindfulness, and remain in it.
Lee is a trained Yoga instructor. That lifestyle, and the Mindfulness that goes with it, is the intentional continuation of Lee's journey. His book, Internal Volume, explains some of that.
Internal Volume can be purchased here: https://www.amazon.com/INTERNAL-Where-Monster-Mindfulness-Become/dp/B09251YC1K
His story is gritty, real, and inspiring. You will not be able to put the book down.
If you prefer audiobooks...get it here... https://www.audible.com/pd/INTERNAL-VOLUME-Where-A-Monster-And-Mindfulness-Become-One-Audiobook/B0FXDZ69W7?srsltid=AfmBOorDJmEB7Hd-CgxhWOPYDnzaKFPHkT0MWf1bQ3qVIX-XKECL1rAj
To try to better understand the concept of Mindfulness, I found this definition..."To be present in the moment, and help quiet the mind. and cultivate a deeper connection and understanding of self."
By taking on that journey, what Lee calls his, "Internal Volume" is reduced, better regulated, and lived in.
Reading Lee's book helps you consider your own Internal Volume. He equips others, through yoga, and sharing his life experiences to be better, and live better.
Lee's story and friendship though the years has made me a stronger, better person. I'm encouraged when I read Lee's book, and talk to him. I can learn from him.
Look for those kinds of friends and influences. Are your friends making you a better person? You might need new friends.
Our past is our past. We can't change it. What we can do learn from it, and know what makes us tick. Recognize, and learn from our weaknesses. Make our strenghts more of who we are and be available to others.
We can make today, and the future better with better choices, and better friends. Be prepared to give back, and help somebody.
I wonder sometimes if getting knocked out twice when I was a kid opened up a pathway in my brain that was unaccessable.
Maybe that made me quirky, or quiet, or thoughtful, or a hundred other things. Maybe it made my sense of humor more prominent.
Pretty sure it didn't make me any smarter.
Then again,
Maybe it didn't change a thing.
Maybe it didn't change a thing.