Finding the right work / life balance...Is it possible?
Sweet or salty. Anerobic or Aerobic. The list goes on and on. When it comes to your work life, what is the right balance between Mental and Physical?
I think most people work a job that either stresses them out mentally, or wears them out physically. Is there a balance? Two years ago, in June, 2017, I shifted my balance from mental, to physical.
First a look back...
My first "real" job was with Kraft Foods.
During the ten years with Kraft, I married Terri Jolley, we had two children, and we moved three times. I was doing well with Kraft, but the grocery business was changing. Computers and buying systems improved, and big grocers consolidated their buying to central locations. Fewer buyers required fewer sellers. Our customers had gotten more efficient. At the same time, Proctor and Gamble pushed price, not so much customer service. This was to keep Wal-Mart and a few huge grocery chains happy. They led the way , Kraft and the other food manufacturers followed. Through attrition, and early retirement offers, the number of Kraft employees declined.
We were living in Gray, just outside of Johnson City, Tennessee. Our neighbors, Don, Beth, Emily, Damon and Nanny, Brian and Kathy, and Mrs. Irma across the street, were our new family. They spoiled us and our two girls. Being so far from our family, these dear people loved us and we loved them. (our house in Gray)
I was told that my next job with Kraft would require another move. We were already five hours from my parents in Tullahoma, and a seven hour drive to see Terri's family in Martin, TN. Karen, our oldest was 4, and Robin, our second daughter was 2. We decided it was time to change jobs, and get closer to some family. I attended a Kraft meeting in Knoxville on a Thursday, where I received my ten year service award, a nice pair of binoculars that I still have. I had an interview the next day in Nashville for an opening with Lehigh Safety Shoes.
Kraft people: I left some wonderful friends and mentors at Kraft. Many of these people I still talk to and depend on for their friendship. Kathy Overall-Bates, and Cindy Semmes, both from Tullahoma, were working at Kraft before me. Because of their good reputations, sales results, and recommending me for an opening, I got an interview. I will always be indebted to them for this opportunity. John Holton was my first boss. He had a wonderful sense of humor, and he taught me and encouraged me to be a good employee, and a good man. Tim Skinner was from Clarksville Tn. He and I started about the same time. We progressed through the ranks and worked some of the same accounts. The last accounts we were on were Fleming Foods and White's Fresh Foods during the Johnson City days. We worked well together, and are still good friends. Ken Johnson, Randy Rainey, and Johnny Carroll were all supervisors that taught me valuable work and life skills. Ken also had the best sense of humor, and we laughed and learned a lot from him. Brad Williams and Robert Wood were hard working guys that found reasons to laugh and have fun. Ivan Wilson, Kenny Evans, Rhonda (Hobbs) McCutchen, Teresa Walt, Dan Latham, Keith Wilkerson, Danny Walker, Phil Allison, Ellen Workman, Mark Sharp, Joey Stilley, Bud Castle, Clem Starkey, Luke McClure, Ron Siedentopf, Mike Frost, Donnie Bowles, and Steve Laws, are early team mates and friends. New talent and energy was added to our team with Robin Williams, Angie Mensi, and others. With the acquisition of other food companies, I learned all about Oscar Mayer, Maxwell House Coffee, and General Foods, and made more friends. Lynn Legler Lancaster, John Nutter, Jim Smith, and many others.
That was lengthy, but the question is still, what's the right balance? Is it a spicy recipe where a pinch of brown sugar offsets the hot sauce? Or maybe a bike rider balancing the effort of legs and lungs, by shifting into different gears and spinning the pedals? I think the right balance changes as we go through our working life. For now, the balance for me seems just about right.
I was told that my next job with Kraft would require another move. We were already five hours from my parents in Tullahoma, and a seven hour drive to see Terri's family in Martin, TN. Karen, our oldest was 4, and Robin, our second daughter was 2. We decided it was time to change jobs, and get closer to some family. I attended a Kraft meeting in Knoxville on a Thursday, where I received my ten year service award, a nice pair of binoculars that I still have. I had an interview the next day in Nashville for an opening with Lehigh Safety Shoes.
Kraft people: I left some wonderful friends and mentors at Kraft. Many of these people I still talk to and depend on for their friendship. Kathy Overall-Bates, and Cindy Semmes, both from Tullahoma, were working at Kraft before me. Because of their good reputations, sales results, and recommending me for an opening, I got an interview. I will always be indebted to them for this opportunity. John Holton was my first boss. He had a wonderful sense of humor, and he taught me and encouraged me to be a good employee, and a good man. Tim Skinner was from Clarksville Tn. He and I started about the same time. We progressed through the ranks and worked some of the same accounts. The last accounts we were on were Fleming Foods and White's Fresh Foods during the Johnson City days. We worked well together, and are still good friends. Ken Johnson, Randy Rainey, and Johnny Carroll were all supervisors that taught me valuable work and life skills. Ken also had the best sense of humor, and we laughed and learned a lot from him. Brad Williams and Robert Wood were hard working guys that found reasons to laugh and have fun. Ivan Wilson, Kenny Evans, Rhonda (Hobbs) McCutchen, Teresa Walt, Dan Latham, Keith Wilkerson, Danny Walker, Phil Allison, Ellen Workman, Mark Sharp, Joey Stilley, Bud Castle, Clem Starkey, Luke McClure, Ron Siedentopf, Mike Frost, Donnie Bowles, and Steve Laws, are early team mates and friends. New talent and energy was added to our team with Robin Williams, Angie Mensi, and others. With the acquisition of other food companies, I learned all about Oscar Mayer, Maxwell House Coffee, and General Foods, and made more friends. Lynn Legler Lancaster, John Nutter, Jim Smith, and many others.
Left to right...Tim Skinner, Terri Harless, Ron Siedentoph, Mike Frost, Donnie Bowles, standing Ivan Wilson, Bud Castle. This was at a kickoff meeting in Naples Florida, fall of 1987.
Chattanooga Sales team - ...bottom row - Clem Starkey, Luke McClure. Standing - Steve Stone, Kathy Overall Bates, Johnny Carroll, Bud Castle, Kenneth Johnson, Joey Stilley, Greg Hawkins, and Ivan Wilson. Danny Walker ( in the photo above with Clem) must have taken the group picture. Chattanooga sales team. Mack Smith Road office. 1989?
From food to shoes...
The Friday interview with Fred Kuhnen for the job with Lehigh went well. He offered me a job on the spot. Lehigh Safety Shoes provides work boots and shoes to working people. I was their new District Sales manager in Nashville. My territory stretched east to west, from Johnson City to the Tennessee river. Again, there was a mix between mental and physical. After some training, and thank you Eddie Horton, I was turned loose to succeed or fail. The necessity to succeed and be the sole bread winner in a family of four is a solid motivator. I learned quickly, and my two largest customers, Alcoa in Alcoa, TN, and Saturn in Spring Hill, liked me and the products we sold. Footnote ( pun intended ) people deduct IQ points when a person sells shoes for a livin, AKA Al Bundy. I tried to use this to my advantage. About the same time, Michael Jordan walked away from the Chicago Bulls, and started playing baseball. So I would tell people...Michael Jordan is playing baseball, I'm selling shoes, everybody has a dream to chase.
From food to shoes...
The Friday interview with Fred Kuhnen for the job with Lehigh went well. He offered me a job on the spot. Lehigh Safety Shoes provides work boots and shoes to working people. I was their new District Sales manager in Nashville. My territory stretched east to west, from Johnson City to the Tennessee river. Again, there was a mix between mental and physical. After some training, and thank you Eddie Horton, I was turned loose to succeed or fail. The necessity to succeed and be the sole bread winner in a family of four is a solid motivator. I learned quickly, and my two largest customers, Alcoa in Alcoa, TN, and Saturn in Spring Hill, liked me and the products we sold. Footnote ( pun intended ) people deduct IQ points when a person sells shoes for a livin, AKA Al Bundy. I tried to use this to my advantage. About the same time, Michael Jordan walked away from the Chicago Bulls, and started playing baseball. So I would tell people...Michael Jordan is playing baseball, I'm selling shoes, everybody has a dream to chase.
I did this for two years. I was rewarded for my efforts, and our teams success with a District Manager of the Year award for the Southeast Region. Pretty good considering they didn't protect our sales territories, and Harold, the old Lehigh guy in Alabama sold nearly as many shoes in Nashville as we did. Matt Tiffany was our shoe store manager, and Jennifer Clark was the store clerk. We had a good team.
From shoes to band-aids...
In setting up for safety shows, and going where the customers were, I ran into an old friend from UT Martin. Marvin Neely was one of two people that owned Respond First Aid Systems.
He is a fraternity brother, and a trusted friend. He made me an offer to work for him, and I accepted. Marvin and Guy Christopher taught me the business, and trusted me to help them grow it. Again, the mental and physical demands were well balanced, and the work and people agreed with me. We provided supplies to working people. First aid, safety, PPE, over the counter medicines like BC Powders, whatever they wanted. We were bought out ten years later, after doubling in size. I worked for the new company for twenty three months and two weeks. They fired me the week before Christmas. The buyout had some small print, and this was the first opportunity they had to send me home. By now we were a family of five, with a stay at home mom. I was surprised, and a little hurt. I didn't get mad, but I did try to say something clever. I said, I guess I'll be home for Christmas.
They ended Guy's employment on the same day. He was late to work so I got the axe first. We still joke that he outlasted me. We cleared out our desks, and the locksmith arrived at 9, as promised, to change the locks. Guy and I went to an early lunch, and talked for a couple of hours.
Looking back, they did me a favor. I didn't like what they were doing to our business and customers, and they didn't like when I asked questions about their greedy business practices. When you are losing loyal costumers by the dozens, and you are the guy they send out to smooth things over, its hard to run with the company flag. Still, I left some close and dear friends there. Jessica, Brandon, Justin, Cheryl, Anthony, Derrick, Larry, MaryAnn, and others.
Six Months Off
For the next six months, I was out of work. We had saved some money, and there was still a need to get another job, but we didn't miss any meals, or necessities. I became the dad volunteer at the school, and picked the kids up in the car line. I also got to help coach Robin's middle school basketball team. The best advice I got during this time was from Steve May, Director of Marketing Operations at Jack Daniel's Distillery. He told me to spend part of every day working at finding a job, and part of every day working out and getting in the best shape of my life. I made a daily habit of filling out applications, emailing, mailing, calling about jobs. Also, I started to ride my bike again, and went to the local gym, Harvey's. I made some new friends, and lost about 60 pounds. Looking back, Mr. May's advice forced me to stay active and alert mentally and physically. This was key to any success and general good health, then, and now.
Medical Office Manager
Interview on the stairs at church.
Dr. Marcus Lee and I belong to the same church.
I was going up the stairs one Sunday, and he was walking down. In passing, he asked me if I was working anywhere yet. I said no, just staying busy doing odd jobs, till I get a real job. He stated that he had a job for me. I was excited, and said , sure what do you need me to do. I assumed that he wanted me to mow, fix, or paint something at his house. He could tell I was a little confused, and said, no not at my house, at my office. Now I was thinking he needed me to fix or paint something at his office. Dr. Lee is a kind and patient man. He said, no. Inside. Working for me, every day. Oh, wow, I remember saying. Should we set up a time for an interview, I can bring you a resume? No, he said, I have been praying about this, and the job is yours if you want it. We met a few days later at his office, shook hands on our agreement, and I
went to work.
This time the balance was 90% mental and 10% physical. Every chance I had, without really planning it, I took on physical tasks that were available. Mowing, cleaning the building, driving to buy new equipment, etc. I managed his office. I learned QuickBooks, paid all the bills, made sure we kept up with his credentialing, kept the place clean and full of all types of supplies, and was the occasional bouncer. Our billing office had expertise in areas that I did not, and we made a good team. We expanded and remodeled to increase capacity. Then we added a second parking lot and new building. Dr. Lee entered into a partnership with Roberta Adams and her company, Trinity Clinical Trials. We doubled the number of patients seen a day. I loved all the people I worked with, and almost all of the patients. I'm a pretty good listener. And a good listener can keep other people happy by delivering what they want and need. I can still tell you the nurses favorite blizzard flavor, and who likes fiery hot Cheetos, or a blue ink pen. I continue to stay in contact with Denise, Amy, Kayla, Kala, Traci, Rachelle, Sandy, Christine, Ashley, Patty, Sarah, and others from Dr. Lee's office.
I will forever be grateful to Dr. Lee. He put me to work when I really needed a job. Ten years passed quickly. One afternoon at the outside picnic table, with tears in my eyes, I told Dr. Lee I thought I had to leave. He asked me where I was going, and I said I didn't know, but I was just slowing down, and didn't like how that felt. I was 51 years old, and was not ready to get old yet. He assured me he understood, and said I could stay as long as I wanted to stay. There are not many people, bosses especially, that you can be that honest with. Dr. Lee is one of a kind. He is the hardest working, and toughest, nice guy I have ever known. For the next few months, I tied up loose ends, got everything current, and made a hand-off binder for the next office manager. I was open to a new opportunity, but I didn't go searching for a job, or post anything online.
Faith, Family, Farm
During this time, a life long friend, Josh Cole asked me about joining him at the Franklin County Farmers Co-op in Decherd, Tennessee. They had just gone through a remodel, and needed a warehouse manager.
I interviewed with Doug Swann, the General Manager for the open position. The job would be cold in the winter, hot in the summer, and require lifting posts, gates, and 50 pound bags constantly. Also, its an hourly job, six days a week. So for the last two and a half years, I have worn blue jeans, a co-op cap, and used my body way more than my brain. I'd guess its 90% physical and 10% mental. If you are familiar with sawmill grade lumber, that's what its like back here. A little rough, not perfect, but tough and durable. I have enjoyed this challenge, and continue to show up, do the work, and try to improve the processes here.
I put big expensive items online on the LSN (Local Sales Network) website to allow a wider audience to see what is available. We sold and delivered 10 wood stoves by doing this. Also, the computer system had a mapping function that was unused. I mapped out the items in the warehouse, so that just about anybody can find things now.
From shoes to band-aids...
In setting up for safety shows, and going where the customers were, I ran into an old friend from UT Martin. Marvin Neely was one of two people that owned Respond First Aid Systems.
He is a fraternity brother, and a trusted friend. He made me an offer to work for him, and I accepted. Marvin and Guy Christopher taught me the business, and trusted me to help them grow it. Again, the mental and physical demands were well balanced, and the work and people agreed with me. We provided supplies to working people. First aid, safety, PPE, over the counter medicines like BC Powders, whatever they wanted. We were bought out ten years later, after doubling in size. I worked for the new company for twenty three months and two weeks. They fired me the week before Christmas. The buyout had some small print, and this was the first opportunity they had to send me home. By now we were a family of five, with a stay at home mom. I was surprised, and a little hurt. I didn't get mad, but I did try to say something clever. I said, I guess I'll be home for Christmas.
They ended Guy's employment on the same day. He was late to work so I got the axe first. We still joke that he outlasted me. We cleared out our desks, and the locksmith arrived at 9, as promised, to change the locks. Guy and I went to an early lunch, and talked for a couple of hours.
Looking back, they did me a favor. I didn't like what they were doing to our business and customers, and they didn't like when I asked questions about their greedy business practices. When you are losing loyal costumers by the dozens, and you are the guy they send out to smooth things over, its hard to run with the company flag. Still, I left some close and dear friends there. Jessica, Brandon, Justin, Cheryl, Anthony, Derrick, Larry, MaryAnn, and others.
Six Months Off
For the next six months, I was out of work. We had saved some money, and there was still a need to get another job, but we didn't miss any meals, or necessities. I became the dad volunteer at the school, and picked the kids up in the car line. I also got to help coach Robin's middle school basketball team. The best advice I got during this time was from Steve May, Director of Marketing Operations at Jack Daniel's Distillery. He told me to spend part of every day working at finding a job, and part of every day working out and getting in the best shape of my life. I made a daily habit of filling out applications, emailing, mailing, calling about jobs. Also, I started to ride my bike again, and went to the local gym, Harvey's. I made some new friends, and lost about 60 pounds. Looking back, Mr. May's advice forced me to stay active and alert mentally and physically. This was key to any success and general good health, then, and now.
Medical Office Manager
Interview on the stairs at church.
Dr. Marcus Lee and I belong to the same church.
I was going up the stairs one Sunday, and he was walking down. In passing, he asked me if I was working anywhere yet. I said no, just staying busy doing odd jobs, till I get a real job. He stated that he had a job for me. I was excited, and said , sure what do you need me to do. I assumed that he wanted me to mow, fix, or paint something at his house. He could tell I was a little confused, and said, no not at my house, at my office. Now I was thinking he needed me to fix or paint something at his office. Dr. Lee is a kind and patient man. He said, no. Inside. Working for me, every day. Oh, wow, I remember saying. Should we set up a time for an interview, I can bring you a resume? No, he said, I have been praying about this, and the job is yours if you want it. We met a few days later at his office, shook hands on our agreement, and I
went to work.
This time the balance was 90% mental and 10% physical. Every chance I had, without really planning it, I took on physical tasks that were available. Mowing, cleaning the building, driving to buy new equipment, etc. I managed his office. I learned QuickBooks, paid all the bills, made sure we kept up with his credentialing, kept the place clean and full of all types of supplies, and was the occasional bouncer. Our billing office had expertise in areas that I did not, and we made a good team. We expanded and remodeled to increase capacity. Then we added a second parking lot and new building. Dr. Lee entered into a partnership with Roberta Adams and her company, Trinity Clinical Trials. We doubled the number of patients seen a day. I loved all the people I worked with, and almost all of the patients. I'm a pretty good listener. And a good listener can keep other people happy by delivering what they want and need. I can still tell you the nurses favorite blizzard flavor, and who likes fiery hot Cheetos, or a blue ink pen. I continue to stay in contact with Denise, Amy, Kayla, Kala, Traci, Rachelle, Sandy, Christine, Ashley, Patty, Sarah, and others from Dr. Lee's office.
I will forever be grateful to Dr. Lee. He put me to work when I really needed a job. Ten years passed quickly. One afternoon at the outside picnic table, with tears in my eyes, I told Dr. Lee I thought I had to leave. He asked me where I was going, and I said I didn't know, but I was just slowing down, and didn't like how that felt. I was 51 years old, and was not ready to get old yet. He assured me he understood, and said I could stay as long as I wanted to stay. There are not many people, bosses especially, that you can be that honest with. Dr. Lee is one of a kind. He is the hardest working, and toughest, nice guy I have ever known. For the next few months, I tied up loose ends, got everything current, and made a hand-off binder for the next office manager. I was open to a new opportunity, but I didn't go searching for a job, or post anything online.
Faith, Family, Farm
During this time, a life long friend, Josh Cole asked me about joining him at the Franklin County Farmers Co-op in Decherd, Tennessee. They had just gone through a remodel, and needed a warehouse manager.
I interviewed with Doug Swann, the General Manager for the open position. The job would be cold in the winter, hot in the summer, and require lifting posts, gates, and 50 pound bags constantly. Also, its an hourly job, six days a week. So for the last two and a half years, I have worn blue jeans, a co-op cap, and used my body way more than my brain. I'd guess its 90% physical and 10% mental. If you are familiar with sawmill grade lumber, that's what its like back here. A little rough, not perfect, but tough and durable. I have enjoyed this challenge, and continue to show up, do the work, and try to improve the processes here.
I put big expensive items online on the LSN (Local Sales Network) website to allow a wider audience to see what is available. We sold and delivered 10 wood stoves by doing this. Also, the computer system had a mapping function that was unused. I mapped out the items in the warehouse, so that just about anybody can find things now.
The mental freedom here allows using some of my my brain power and emotional capital to stay better plugged in with my kids, wife, and those around me that need me. I find myself sketching pictures and writing and sending notes. All left brain stuff that I used to not have time for. Most importantly, our aging parents require daily assistance, and this job has been the right place to be. I get off on time, and I'm able to do my part to help my two sisters care for them, and assist with their daily needs.
That was lengthy, but the question is still, what's the right balance? Is it a spicy recipe where a pinch of brown sugar offsets the hot sauce? Or maybe a bike rider balancing the effort of legs and lungs, by shifting into different gears and spinning the pedals? I think the right balance changes as we go through our working life. For now, the balance for me seems just about right.